This Just In: Adam Lambert Is Gay (GASP)  

Posted by: Cameon in , , , ,

I have one of those fancy clock radios that plays music when I wake up in the morning. I find that usually it soothes me and helps me to get up. I mean, how could waking up to Keith Urban singing about staying in the bed all day not wake someone up right?

Occassinally, I wake up to the news which usually makes me want to hide back under the covers. There are car wrecks, thunderstorms pounding one of the coasts, robberies in 4 counties overnight, and a church that has burned down all while I slept.

But, the "BREAKING NEWS!" this morning was that Adam Lambert came out in a Rolling Stones interview and said he was indeed gay.

I was dumbfounded. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know what to say. My life was changed forever as I knew it. What would I do now?

And then it hit me. HEEEEELLLLLLLOOOOOO??!! EVERYONE KNEW THAT!

This guy is a joke if he didn't think no one had caught onto that. If he was trying to hide it, maybe he should have not commented on Paula's ensembles on air.

But the thing is, he did know people knew because he said the reason he lost was because of his sexuality. Hummm...someone hath called the media and told.

And maybe he did. Or, maybe it was because people liked Kris better. Maybe it's because parents watch that show and they weren't impressed by his dapper costumes and bedazzling abilities.

Maybe it was because teens were kinda freaked out by him. Or maybe, he was close but just not close enough.

MAYBE IT WAS RIGGED!!

Adam was talented. I will give him that. I thought Kris was better and not trying so hard he became fake...but hey, I'm only one person. Although Adam also mentioned how cute Kris was and how he was a distraction. (Watch out Mrs. Allen)

But this Adam, surely he knows after the Clay Aiken incident that people are accustomed to gay American Idols. I'm sure Adam will come out with a record deal. I'm even willing to bet my bedazzler on it, and it's never been used.

Bottom line, Adam Lambert is gay. I just thought everyone should know so that your life could be changed as much as mine was.

I have done my deed.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, June 09, 2009 and is filed under , , , , . You can leave a response and follow any responses to this entry through the Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom) .

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